when that day comes, gladly will hearts rejoice
chemistry's fusion, mine in the making
talking to all men in a love laced voice
this has always been mine for the taking

bluebirds with sirens singing in chorus
with notes so lovely and heavenly sweet
special, they created it just for us
containing overtones of rhyming beats

eyes fluttering as the butterfly wings
listening to dear love while it enters
bathing in the warmth of the glistening strings
enjoying the banishment of winters

this love spoken of,no tears will i cry
silently waiting, yes is the reply


i know it needs some work so
comments are welcome!!!

I particularly like "bluebirds, their sirens singing in chorus" This is a lovely job and I like it very much! G.

glistening strings----from what????

me dummmy-

and by the way- very romantic, and I dig it alot--- musical them...........let's see what bman and/or foggy says,...........

lash570 wrote:

glistening strings----from what???? me dummmy- and by the way- very romantic, and I dig it alot--- musical theme...........let's see what bman and/or foggy says,...........

of the sun

you are not!!!!
and thanks alot!!!!

arb, this is a heck of a job! no issues with the imagery of the content. softy lash already commented on the romantic qualities of this piece. my only nits are with the meter - i'd love to see the consistency in the syllable count and in the pattern of stressed/unstessed syllables. but then again i've seen shakespear screw that up a lot too...LOL

Bogeyman wrote:

arb, this is a heck of a job! no issues with the imagery of the content. softy lash already commented on the romantic qualities of this piece. my only nits are with the meter - i'd love to see the consistency in the syllable count and in the pattern of stressed/unstessed syllables. but then again i've seen shakespear screw that up a lot too...LOL

well thank you
i feel like taking a bow now
i have a problem with meter but i will work on it!!!
thanks for looking!!