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PinkNeonFlavor Likes the forums


  
Joined: Dec 11, 2009 Posts: 319 Credits: 1 Location: In a pond of euphoric infliction. It dazzles with iridescent agony.

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Posted: Sat Jun 19 13:37:13 EDT 2010 Post subject: What Are Some of Your First Poems Ever? |
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Here are mine from 9 and 10 years
Here I Am To Shine
I'm a princess and fine
when I dance I tap my feet
Everyone tells me I look
so neat
My bedroom is so clean
and pretty as I even
have my own kitty
so I wake up feeling happy
That was my first poem...ever
Here one after this poem
I Am A Bird
I am a bird that is flying
so I will be flying across the sea
later I will fly around a tree
tomorrow I will take in the grass
after my break I will go back
and fly
Then ones from like 13 years
Simplicity
Stars, hearts, squares, diamonds.
Let me lay in bed, getting at me.
Trying to let me wonder what led me to this,
this beautiful, simply beautiful life.
Then suddenly I wake up someday,
looking deep inside of these shapes.
And how the light that shines through them is bright,
lets me smile at all of the small things that
are invisible to the human eye and are smaller than germs.
They are only a speck,
yet are so marvelous,
so miraculous,
and so simple,
that it matters the most.
Simplicity at its finest...
is the bright light
of this wonderful life. Indeed
Dreamland Castle
Rainbow castle fascinating detail
Turned into a rave of rhythm
Where dreams are in a lot of hue
Friends join hands fiends are gone
Neon lights are essential
Glow sticks are glowing
We are dancing on the dance floor
This is our dreamland dance club
We are feeling ecstatic and euphoric
Electronic dance music is playing
It's an all night techno dance party
In a raver's dreamland castle
So what are yours? When did you start writing...?
My earliest poem on this site is Affectionate Heart...which I wrote at 15...
but I wrote these few before then...
_________________ ~If you're a sorceress, then why don't you look at the world with three-dimensional eyes to poke lasers through life, like magic?
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fogglethorpe Who knew we would get this far?


                 
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Posted: Mon Jun 21 12:02:40 EDT 2010 Post subject: Re: What Are Some of Your First Poems Ever? |
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"Simplicity" has possibilities with a little editing.
_________________ "What the hell is this? For cryin' out loud, somebody throw a pie!" - Peter Griffin |
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PinkNeonFlavor Likes the forums


  
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Posted: Mon Jun 21 12:05:40 EDT 2010 Post subject: Re: What Are Some of Your First Poems Ever? |
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What does that mean? I know, they aren't very good considering I just started writing poetry then...
_________________ ~If you're a sorceress, then why don't you look at the world with three-dimensional eyes to poke lasers through life, like magic?
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fogglethorpe Who knew we would get this far?


                 
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Posted: Mon Jun 21 12:08:44 EDT 2010 Post subject: Re: What Are Some of Your First Poems Ever? |
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It means that I think you did a good job on it. It's a mature write for a young person, and may just need a little editing to be a keeper.
_________________ "What the hell is this? For cryin' out loud, somebody throw a pie!" - Peter Griffin |
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PinkNeonFlavor Likes the forums


  
Joined: Dec 11, 2009 Posts: 319 Credits: 1 Location: In a pond of euphoric infliction. It dazzles with iridescent agony.

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Posted: Mon Jun 21 12:12:05 EDT 2010 Post subject: Re: What Are Some of Your First Poems Ever? |
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OK, Gotcha. I thought it was an insult at first...Thanks xD
_________________ ~If you're a sorceress, then why don't you look at the world with three-dimensional eyes to poke lasers through life, like magic?
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fogglethorpe Who knew we would get this far?


                 
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Posted: Mon Jun 21 12:31:57 EDT 2010 Post subject: Re: What Are Some of Your First Poems Ever? |
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I don't do insults..only honest assessments.
_________________ "What the hell is this? For cryin' out loud, somebody throw a pie!" - Peter Griffin |
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PinkNeonFlavor Likes the forums


  
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Posted: Mon Jun 21 12:35:20 EDT 2010 Post subject: Re: What Are Some of Your First Poems Ever? |
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That is good. Insults are pointless, honesty is helpful.
_________________ ~If you're a sorceress, then why don't you look at the world with three-dimensional eyes to poke lasers through life, like magic?
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cathy.robinson Has written an Occasional poem or two.


  
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Posted: Mon Jun 21 19:10:24 EDT 2010 Post subject: Re: What Are Some of Your First Poems Ever? |
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i think i've blocked out most of my early years...i was only four when i wrote my first poem. i got in trouble for rhyming in 1st grade. the word was "duck", and i got carried away(probably why i stick mainly to free verse)....i do remember my daughter's first poem, though, and i thought it was incredibly insightful...here it is:
the wind
by sevyn robinson
i can feel the wind,
but it doesn't feel like anything.
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wordsmithwannabe "I'm not mad. I'm just PISSED OFF!"


                   
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Posted: Mon Jun 21 20:15:13 EDT 2010 Post subject: Re: What Are Some of Your First Poems Ever? |
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i don't remember back that far, too many years to take into consideration haha i think my first legitimate poem was about the ocean (big shocker there) and it was for my mom...she probably still has it packed away in one of her keepsake boxes
_________________ i really really really hate repetitious redundancy. |
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fogglethorpe Who knew we would get this far?


                 
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Posted: Mon Jun 21 20:29:05 EDT 2010 Post subject: Re: What Are Some of Your First Poems Ever? |
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| cathy.robinson wrote: |
the wind
by sevyn robinson
i can feel the wind,
but it doesn't feel like anything. |
There is something so pure and deep about that. Very nice.
I have a few old "things" around..but I will not post any of them even if you beg. Especially if you beg.
_________________ "What the hell is this? For cryin' out loud, somebody throw a pie!" - Peter Griffin |
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wordsmithwannabe "I'm not mad. I'm just PISSED OFF!"


                   
Joined: Jan 31, 2010 Posts: 4318 Credits: 74 Location: Somewhere between a rock, a hard place, and all points in between. Also known as Vancouver, WA...

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Posted: Thu Jun 24 0:33:15 EDT 2010 Post subject: Re: What Are Some of Your First Poems Ever? |
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what about groveling? or bribery? bribery is always good, there's cash involved...
_________________ i really really really hate repetitious redundancy. |
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fogglethorpe Who knew we would get this far?


                 
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Posted: Thu Jun 24 11:47:44 EDT 2010 Post subject: Re: What Are Some of Your First Poems Ever? |
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Hmm..I may consider a bribe.
_________________ "What the hell is this? For cryin' out loud, somebody throw a pie!" - Peter Griffin |
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wordsmithwannabe "I'm not mad. I'm just PISSED OFF!"


                   
Joined: Jan 31, 2010 Posts: 4318 Credits: 74 Location: Somewhere between a rock, a hard place, and all points in between. Also known as Vancouver, WA...

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Posted: Fri Jun 25 12:53:48 EDT 2010 Post subject: Re: What Are Some of Your First Poems Ever? |
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i have exactly $3.67 in my checking account, it's all yours...
_________________ i really really really hate repetitious redundancy. |
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fogglethorpe Who knew we would get this far?


                 
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Posted: Mon Jun 28 16:30:26 EDT 2010 Post subject: Re: What Are Some of Your First Poems Ever? |
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Buy yourself some coffee. I would rather not embarrass myself.
_________________ "What the hell is this? For cryin' out loud, somebody throw a pie!" - Peter Griffin |
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Huberjack Told love the world was on fire


             
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Posted: Tue Jun 29 15:38:22 EDT 2010 Post subject: Re: What Are Some of Your First Poems Ever? |
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I wish I had my poetry from when I was a kid. I remember one was called "I, Lonely," a recital of which won my brother a talent contest once. That was when I was about 13 and he was 11. The only line I remember was the last, which was "forever laughs the pawn." Hey, I still like that line!
_________________ Jack Huber
Writing free verse is like playing tennis with the net down. --Robert Frost (1874-1963) |
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fogglethorpe Who knew we would get this far?


                 
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Posted: Tue Jun 29 17:54:50 EDT 2010 Post subject: Re: What Are Some of Your First Poems Ever? |
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I still have poems I wrote in 1984, when I was young, invincible, and wise. I'm not sure what happened to me since then.
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zhaul Been here longer than 3 servers ago.


   
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PinkNeonFlavor Likes the forums


  
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Posted: Mon Jul 5 12:54:57 EDT 2010 Post subject: Re: What Are Some of Your First Poems Ever? |
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Yeah I just really started a year ago although I wrote some beforehand. My teacher never taught me anything I read it all online...
and...
What the.....?!? Why would your girlfriend burn your work?
_________________ ~If you're a sorceress, then why don't you look at the world with three-dimensional eyes to poke lasers through life, like magic?
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zhaul Been here longer than 3 servers ago.


   
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scmatsuura Regular


   
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Posted: Tue Jul 6 18:39:42 EDT 2010 Post subject: Re: What Are Some of Your First Poems Ever? |
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My first poem:
Rain falls from a cloudy sky
I splash in the puddles nearby.
If it rains, the worms come out
And if they don't, they'll die.
(Apparently my emo phase started in the 1st grade.)
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