Judge this Poem
User Info
Welcome Anonymous
 Membership:
 Latest: stumto
 New Today: 0
 New Yesterday: 2
 Overall: 16645
People Online:
 Members: 1
 Visitors: 78
Bots: 3
 Staff: 0
Staff Online:No staff currently online.
Paid Membership
Buy a paid membership and get more out of GotPoetry!
Advertise on the GotPoetry Advertising Network.
Donations
 GotPoetry is a community supported site.
Due Date:
May 31
May Goal:
180.00
Gross Amount:
0.00
PayPal Fees:
0.00
Net Balance:
0.00
Below Goal:
180.00
Site Currency:
USD
Top Poetry Clubs
|
Forums > > Poetry Workshops > > Love Poetry > > Crystal Souls
Crystal Souls
| View previous topic :: View next topic |
| Author |
Message |
FuchsiaFestival!
Poet
 
Joined: Feb 10, 2011
Posts: 1027
Credits: 1
Location: In the Persistence of Memory swimming with Dali
|
 Posted: Tue Dec 27 4:10:17 EST 2011 Post subject: Crystal Souls |
 |
A silent view, rapport
billowed in the webbed night:
love flared in crystal souls
in hopes tranquility would
sing.
Minds drenched
in venom traced
winsome eyes--
interlaced
fire with
two burning
breaths.
Souls were held
in the hands of candlelight,
tied to the wall
of love's tension.
In tangible moments, purity
became a dream attained,
through the parsed lips
of spirit
sparked to
light.
_________________
And Alice told me not to drink the poison.
Last edited by FuchsiaFestival! on Wed Dec 28 22:18:22 EST 2011; edited 1 time in total |
|
Karma: 1745.20  
Back to top |
|
 |
fogglethorpe
Who knew we would get this far?
     
Joined: Jan 15, 2008
Posts: 6181
Credits: 546
Location: Sonoran Desert
|
| Posted: Wed Dec 28 14:51:30 EST 2011 Post subject: Re: Crystal Souls |
|
Lovely language in this..esp. S3.
One minor thing.."brewed" moments seems a little odd. I'm not sure I get the use of that adjective. Otherwise, great.
_________________
"What the hell is this? For cryin' out loud, somebody throw a pie!" - Peter Griffin |
|
Karma: 50749.40
Back to top |
|
|
FuchsiaFestival!
Poet
Joined: Feb 10, 2011
Posts: 1027
Credits: 1
Location: In the Persistence of Memory swimming with Dali
|
| Posted: Wed Dec 28 22:19:49 EST 2011 Post subject: Re: Crystal Souls |
|
Yes, thank you for commenting this. The term "brewed moments" is a term (from my perspective) used to define gathered moments.
In order to make it more clear, I changed it to "tangible."
_________________
And Alice told me not to drink the poison. |
|
Karma: 1745.20
Back to top |
|
|
wylde
And for a moment, it was like joy was
Joined: Aug 25, 2010
Posts: 1869
Credits: 16
Location: between my ears. all.ways
|
|
Karma: 2941.20
Back to top |
|
|
electrictiger
And for a moment, it was like joy was
Joined: Sep 18, 2009
Posts: 1932
Credits: 310
Location: Birmingham, Alabama
|
| Posted: Tue Feb 28 23:10:19 EST 2012 Post subject: Re: Crystal Souls |
|
"held in the hands of candlelight,
tied to the wall
of love's tension."
is such a mind-thrilling image.
_________________
Either this wallpaper goes, or I do. |
|
Karma: 2155.90
Back to top |
|
|
|
|
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
|
 Forum FAQ
|
My Posts
Search
