Announcing the winners of Gotpoetry's first Tanka Contest.


We have a tie for the third place.

Taking third place is questionajourney


Rear pew solitude
White knuckle concentration
Warm ray through stained glass
shelters me from self loathing-
Grand meditation of heart


AND


Trick or Treat by badmalthus

in bed with mummy
all the Halloween monsters
eventually vanish

all except
his father's ghost

Second place was awarded to poetryman69

Right before Sunrise
Shadows at the water’s edge
Ducks drift aimlessly
Mist rises in the distance
Shrill shrieks pierce the morning’s calm

And the first place was won by RickTee


a blue dragonfly
clings to my white window blind
in the grey of dawn
icy cold and motionless
i discover her body

Congratulations!!


Thank you so much for taking the time to judge: John, Loisseau, Bogeyman and Rio. We also would like to welcome our new tanka judges fogglethorpe and HSTeech.

What our judges have to say - John


RickTee's first place tanka sends a shiver down me. It is Excellent! I especially like how the double meaning doesn't hit you right away.

poetryman69's second place winner paints an interesting scene. It ends with the jarring sound of the shriek leaving you to wonder.

Tied for third place, badmathus's "trick or treat", play on the word Mummy starts off strong.

Also tied for third, questionajourney's tanka of colors and light seems more spiritual than supernatural. Still it is a good poem.

loisseau


RickTee's first place tanka has a fine Winter feel to it, blue, white and grey give it a somber feel; the last two lines complete the passage of the dragonfly's life. Well done!

poetryman69's second place winner evokes that errie time of night going to morning, where thngs ain't quite real-or are they? Shierk might be the morning cry of some animal. All in all, supernatural. Well penned.

Tied for third place, badmathus's "trick or treat", recalls the night of Halloween and all the monsters in a child's imagination, save the slightly obscure allusion to the ghost of a father. Where is the father? Provocative.

Also tied for third, questionajourney's introspective tanka of colors and light in a "church" provides the space and place for a needed attention to matters of self esteem. Not quite supernatural unless one assumes a church to be the penultimate place for the supernatural. Thought provoking.

Thanks to all that contributed; a well done to the winners!

Rio


RickTee's tanka is elegantly crafted. It really is amazing how the use of colors actually fed the dim images.

Each line in the tanka by poetryman69 introduces a new image without overpowering the reader. The tension building in this one is both clear and heavy.

The tanka by Badmalthus is very true to Japanese form in its brevity, style and content. The couplet is chilling.

Questionajourney's spiritual tanka has images in it which last in memory. "white knuckle concentration" is my favorite.

fogglethorpe

a blue dragonfly
clings to my white window blind
in the grey of dawn
icy cold and motionless
i discover her body

Creepy and well done, like a condensed horror flick. The ambiguity of line 4, intentional or not, is great.

Right before Sunrise
Shadows at the water’s edge
Ducks drift aimlessly
Mist rises in the distance
Shrill shrieks pierce the morning’s calm

An intriguing captured moment. I like that there is mystery at the end instead of a resolution.
My only nit..."shrill shreiks" is almost a tongue twister. I would have subbed another adjective there.
Otherwise, well done.


Trick or Treat

in bed with mummy
all the Halloween monsters
eventually vanish

all except
his father's ghost

This is my favorite of all the entries. At once sweet and tragic, tender and heartbreaking, but still in keeping with the contest theme.

Rear pew solitude
White knuckle concentration
Warm ray through stained glass
shelters me from self loathing-
Grand meditation of heart

This one appears to be full of contradictions...it goes from peaceful solitude to white knuckle tension to soothing stained glass to self loathing.
I also don't get the last line.

HSTeech


#1: This traditional tanka not only fufills my expectations to connect nature with the personal, it also goes beyond by drawing the reader from the point of the dragonfly to the concept of death on my white blind. I love the color scheme of blue, white and grey which mirrored the "icy cold" of death.

#2: I like the way this tanka starts wide and draws us to a piercing. This little piece make an effective punch by lulling us to drift aimlessly with the ducks, then ripping us awake with the shrieks! My main reservation here was the fact that there was nothing new or surprising in the imagery.

#3: This tanka made great use of contrast: mummy vs. monsters, fear vs. safety, all the ghosts gone except one. There's a certain sadness in how mummy ultimately can't protect the child. I also love how the child, and everything about him, is implied. The deviation in form knocked me a bit, but the imagery absorbed the bumps.

#4: This was probably my favorite. I liked being in the sanctuary with this narrator and being able to see the intensity of prayer via the white knuckles. There's an interesting volley in here between solace and distress that never gets resolved. Prayer isn't often as tangible as this.

The rest of the entries:

Sorceress is here,
practicing her cunning art,
living among us,
watching, with flaming red hair
and spiderwebs for stockings.

Magical spirits dance,
as twilight greets the forest,
mystical moonlight’s
ethereal light glows bright
ghostly figures rise tonight..

I pull away from
sleeping husband’s warm backside
watch his serene snooze
can’t resist, pull off covers
he looks super natural

visitor

summoned from the dark
sharpened nails trace shapes on skin
hot breath caresses
creeping crawl of scaly flesh
then a silken sigh, your name

Longing

as cool night winds blow
her ghostly image appears
beckoning his heart
long dress flowing in the breeze
taking her warm hand, he goes

Supranateral


Try An Gel Light Beams
Supersonic Craft A bove
Alien Life Form ed
An droid Con trol Pilot Sun
Picking Up Speed Star Fly Up

Like spirits hidden
Out, then in you…possession
Veering you insane
Its paranormal power
None can prepare or resist

Supernatural

No explanation
In awe of divination
Beyond magical
Paranormal miracle
An occult phenomenon.

The elk looked up
when I decided to shoot
too late our eyes meet
then part and her body cools
I seek that gaze in each bite.

SUPERSTITIOUS

You study the stars
Their affect on birth and path
You claim I’m from Mars
And that my penis is in
Scorpio, but I’m a Virgin

Who's In Your Head

Was dreaming about
What I could not live without
One thing that I dread
Is other thoughts in my head
Pull the sheet tight go to bed

No, no

Little jewelry box
laminated wood and pearl
on mother’s bureau
ladies finest treasure trove
keepsakes, pretty locks of hair
like a pirate, peek inside
treasures I must leave alone

Hells storm

Flames of pure evil
Chilling me from skin to soul
The devils black ice
Scorching innocent spirits
Leaving death to do its job

Closing Days at Dresser Hill


hopeful romantic
one final Frozen Pudding
an autumn-crisp cone
sun skims over Quabbin hills
paints clouds lavender and bronze

Bad crash
driver lays still
all alone
someone holds their hand
Angels with us

Eerie Awakenings


Gloomy ghostly night
Blankets wrapped from head to toe
Sudden whispering
Petrified she gains the strength …
Turned her head… nobody’s there