rainbow

Deleted_User_6308

no heavy hail
can her impale
nor stirring gale
blur her detail-

salient arc cut in the sky;
unmarked but by our marveling eye

Bogeyman

lovely )) no need for a coma in L2, me think ))

rose.storrs

I agree the comma kinda slows it up. I kinda fumbled with it. It's an excellent write

Deleted_User_6308

thanks guys-- hope you are not comma-tosed--
I'll remove !!

Deleted_User_6308

btw-- this was inspired from a news report -- there was film of a halestorm with a rainbow just hangin around

Pujakins

Hey, I'll bet you mean hail? Hale actually means healthy, as in hale and hearty, howeer I don't think that's what you were speaking of, was it? I'd lose the two "hers" I think it reads more rhythmically without them. Perhaps you don't need the semicolon in the next to last line? I think th last line is really cool! I am curious as to why you chose salient? It's an interesting word to describe and rainbow. Warmly, Tasha

Deleted_User_6308

thanks about the spelling error----
lash